Who Am I?

Well I'm just another bored teenager of course. Well I don't like to think of myself as average. I am simply me. I am who God created me to be and I'm ok with that. I'm not perfect. I'm not the prettiest or the smartest girl you'll ever meet, but I'm comfortable in my own skin. I have a purpose in life and I'm going to figure that out and fulfill it someday. I'm different and I don't mind. Some people think I'm weird or strange or crazy, but I don't mind. Love me or hate me, it's your choice and not really something I can change. I know I'm not going to be everyone's favorite person but that's ok, I don't have to be. As long as I can be myself and live life how I should, I'll be happy. I'll deny that sometimes and think I'm miserable, but deep down I'll be happy. I'm not the cookie cutter little miss perfect either. I have my flaws, I've had my tough times that have gone to the extreme. I've gone down dark roads and I'm lucky (not to mention thankful!) to be writing this. Don't try to label me, it's impossible.
Showing posts with label good. Show all posts
Showing posts with label good. Show all posts

Friday, April 2, 2010

Things are looking up oh finally

Well today's another slower day for me. Dyed my hair to a more intense red because I was bored and I just need a change. Even a little change. Ever feel like you just need a change? Like when you just have to start a new notebook to write your songs in or you just have to cut 6 inches of hair off? Yeah, I've done both. Today wasn't one of those days but I just had to dye my hair. I kinda wish it was though. I kinda like the feeling of a fresh start and everything that I get with those changes. Cutting off my hair was a completely new look, not really a new me, but a different me on the outside.
As for my laptop, I got it fixed and the case was pretty messed up when my dad picked it up for me yesterday. I didn't see it till I got home from work but it wasn't good at all. Good news is, today I went back to the repair place and they're replacing the parts for free. Still consider selling this Macbook and buying a Pro but I'll have to see how much money I make in the near future.
Since I didn't have a laptop for the past day and a half, and all my music was on my laptop, and all my homework was on my laptop, I had to have music somehow, so of course to me the only logical thing to do was play guitar. I used my sister's computer while she was at school to pull up chords and tabs and learned "Fifteen" by Taylor Swift and parts of a couple other songs. I tried to learn "Rooftops" by the Lostprophets but that song's in a drop C. The thought of retuning my guitar like that was too intimidating. Maybe when I get an electric I won't be so intimidated...
Even though the title of this post is a song I love, I have yet to try to play it... maybe I'll do that later today...
Well it's only about 2, so maybe my day will get better. It is Good Friday afterall. Today, about 200 centuries ago, my savior gave his life for me. That is something I'll forever be thankful for.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

The Shadow Proves The Sunshine

Yeah, one of my new favorite songs by Switchfoot. It's totally correct because if you see a shadow, you're sure that there's sunshine somewhere, at least a tiny little ray of it through the clouds. Good thought to ponder considering how many things went wrong today. Let's see today I've had this sick to my stomach feeling about Benefest, the chairty event I'm directing. I know I started that project really really late and I'm really pushing it with due dates but it's looking up. It's no where near how amazing my original plan was, but next year it's going to be better.
So then, I did something completely stupid. I forgot I had a disk in my laptop's disk drive and then forgot it was a laptop drive. I put in a half size disk and now the whole thing is jammed. Of course on the day my dad goes and rents a movie. Tomorrow I'll be taking it into the shop to be fixed. The thing about automatic computers is that my Macbook is constantly trying to spit out those disks, not good. Hopefully I'll make some money at work this week to pay off possible replacement of a wreaked disk drive fees.
I'm running on faith with Benefest right now, I have a ton of stuff that needs to be done and I'm super nervous it won't get done. Of course I trust my team, at least to a point. They say they're getting things taken care of, but I just can't help but worrying. Being sick the past few days has really slowed me down and I feel like a complete slacker for it. It's for the good of others, I'm sure I can give up a little sleep for them right? Well actually it's spring break so I'm getting plenty of sleep at the moment but normally...
I just don't want to intimidate the exec board. Sure I worry like crazy, dream up plans and ideas all day, and all that good stuff, but I don't need them feeling they should do the same. I just want a good reliable team that's ready to do things and pull their weight. Right now I'm actually feeling like a slacker because my team is doing so much when I've got so much downtime. Maybe I should add another extra circular... SkillsUSA, Robotics, FCA, Show Choir, Tech Theatre, Theatre club, Science Olympiad, Choral Council, work, church, why do I still have free time? Hmmm... how about just working harder on what I already do? That's a pretty new one...
I just know something good will come out of this. I'm under a shadow but that means there's some sunshine somewhere and it's shining down on me. Soon the clouds will clear away and there'll be a lot more. I just gotta keep myself patient enough to see it, or look harder.